Who am I kidding...

Hmmphh!!!
Who am I kidding man!
Why am I doing all these? Can't I just see that it wasn't meant to be? I should just let it be but now it's too late to take it all back. Most of it is done. Done by me. He doesn't care! He says he hope we can talk again. Yeah... and I hope to become a president one day! I mean, how many times have I tried but it always ends the same way and now I'm trying again. Why? Maybe I wanted to be ignored by him so much.

I should know when to back off and let it be but instead I butted again... letting my emotions take control of the situation. I'm too selfish. Have I not taken into consideration that maybe he doesn't want it? That he is tired of me butting in to salvage what is left. That he doesn't want me as a friend anymore. Why haven't I looked this over before passing him the letter? Have I asked myself all these I wouldn't have even consider writing it, let alone passing it to him.

And now I have even taken up a duty with him late this month. What the hell was I thinking! Slow down man! Your going way too fast. Now it's too late to pull back. Why have I done this?
Am I not suppose to take all of this as a lesson and grow from it? Why come back to it? Why try to make everything work?

The friendship didn't work the first time... what makes you think it would the second time? Well it's not exactly the second time, it was more of like the 10th time. Wish I could turn back time. I really didn't want to do this at first. But what made me do it? I don't know.

I just don't